It’s only just after midnight for me, and thus hardly ‘tomorrow’ at all. But since I had to skip a day of posting, I figured I’ll get this one done now, and probably do another one ‘later today’. Fair? Awesome.
This’ll probably be quickish anyway.
To put it simply: I don’t really regret much of anything. Therefore, there’s not much I look back on thinking ‘if I’d done that differently….’ and genuinely hope the outcome would be different. CAN’T change the past, so why hope? I do, however, sometimes simply wonder about it, all preferences aside.
I’ll sometimes look back, wondering what would have happened if I’d replied to an email faster. Namely, a specific email to a friend; one that died not too long afterwards. I was lazy with emails, and keeping in touch. He might have been unable to email not long after he sent the last one, but he might have. I might have gotten a bit more in, if I hadn’t waited to respond. Maybe not, but maybe.
I wonder if I’d still be close to a couple people if I’d kept my mouth shut. Or if it matters. [I don’t think it does, so I guess that means it doesn’t.]
I wonder how life might be now if I hadn’t taken a chance and emailed the friend who is now my longtime boyfriend on a whim, after not speaking for a year and a half.
Alternately, I wonder how the future might be different if I hadn’t emailed him, or how it’ll be because I did.
How life in general might have been if I’d gone to public school instead of being homeschooled my entire life.
What I’d be doing if I hadn’t participated in all those little sixth-grade chatroom sessions in an online class I took. How weird it seems that I wouldn’t know my boyfriend or a good number of my best friends – or most any of the friends I have now – if I hadn’t.
If life would be any different now if my parents had let me get my permit/license when I was legally allowed, as opposed to only working on the driving bit of the license now, a few weeks before I’m 18.
How I would be as a person if I hadn’t started dating my boyfriend. If I’d have wound up as screwy as I thought I might, or turned around on my own.
I wonder if our family’s lovebird would still like me if I’d bothered to not be a sissy when he decided he was upset with me for leaving for a weekend.
Ya know. Stuff like that.
Tomorrow’s topic: Something that you’re proud of.